When a person with a clipboard approaches me on...
undeadlife: If you actually think physical attractiveness is important in a relationship, you are not shallow. To make a good relationship last you have to be physically and mentally attracted to the person. I am tired of seeing people being called shallow simply because they are looking for someone attractive to them, mentally and physically. You are shallow when physical attractiveness is the...
mugglebornshadowhunter: chazaq: mugglebornshadowhunter: iamronaldraeganfrost: So I’m picking up my little brothers prescription in the CVS drive thru and the lady tells me in a really rude way that she won’t help me until I put out my cigarette out. So I take one last drag, open my door and step on the butt. Then I look up at her, blow out the smoke and tell her politely, I need to pick up...
mugglebornshadowhunter: iamronaldraeganfrost: So I’m picking up my little brothers prescription in the CVS drive thru and the lady tells me in a really rude way that she won’t help me until I put out my cigarette out. So I take one last drag, open my door and step on the butt. Then I look up at her, blow out the smoke and tell her politely, I need to pick up a prescription. Don’t fuck with me...
buddhabrot: metaphorically: i was crying in my car in front of the mcdonalds near my house eating french fries and listening to my sad playlist in the car and a black guy tapped on my window and just gave me life changing advice “its going to be ok lil nigga you can do it” i love this post every time
malekith: malekith: malekith: oh my god i dont have a gag reflex update i just stuck a fork down my throat and nothing happened its official im going to be a prostitute this is the only way to utilize these skills update my mother just walked in on me trying to shove the remote down my throat
LAST MINUTE STUDYING RIGHT BEFORE EXAM
One of the worst injustices in my life is my inability to pee standing up.
i like how i swing from the extremes of fuck everybody to goddammit i don’t wanna be single
me: oh i look nice in this picture
me: i'm gonna use it as profile picture on all my social network accounts for the next 54 years
maybe it’s just me but i really do not get the harlem shake or whatever it’s called?? like it’s just a bunch of people fucking the air………like that is literally all it is.
twophoenixfeathers: twophoenixfeathers: Theraflu is the worst thing ever. I can’t even take a sip without gagging Seriously, this tastes worst than throw up Do not suggest Good thing it was recalled then
walkinggoneggshells: iloveyoujhutch: ifyoucarryonthisway: if youve never had a mental breakdown inside a dressing room because every cute item of clothing looks horrible on your body then you dont know what pain is Remember that one time in the movie White Chicks while she grabs a piece of SKIN this is so unrealistic it’s not even funny
lilypuff asked: hi, miss you olga :)
When I realize how much I've paid in IL taxes on...
gthorndal: so i came up with a joke the other day while i was showering and it’s quite possibly the dumbest thing i’ve ever thought but i laughed for a good five minutes out loud in the shower my mom thought something was wrong with me okay here goes; an attorney defends a man sued for walking around town in his underwear. it was a brief case.
so this girl at school is having a birthday thing (side note: i love how birthday things now happen at bars so you don’t have to get people gifts and it’s not some weird awkward thing) facebook of COURSE does me the honor of informing me that jon is going to be there. SO EXCITED. thanks facebook. i’m so excited that every social event for the next 3.5 years will be marred by...
There are people you will always wait for. You want them to be a part of your...
instead of studying for my two exams next week i just watched every single episode of girls and as stereotypical and cliche as this sounds i am literally hannah. except my boobs are way bigger and don’t make an appearance basically always
lolminoot: Never trust anyone that puts noses in their smiley faces.
long story short i either like people too much or not at all
omgamole: you dont know frustration until youve tried plugging something into a socket in the dark